The Pulse - Issue #3

Another week has flown by and I have a how-to proage piece for you in this, the third issue of The Pulse.

Dr. Nicole Marcione is the Founder of Sexy Smart Aging where she coaches women on how to reclaim our sensuality, sexuality, and positive thoughts on aging.

You’ll be so inspired by what she has to say ..

This is Dr. Nicole:

Most of us have been taught that aging is a bad thing. Most people complain about aging at the least, and are actual ageists at the most. What’s your stance on how you’re aging? It is an important question, as it will literally shape your physical, emotional and mental health as you get older. Aging is a privilege that not everyone is afforded. Aging vibrantly, aging boldly, aging optimally and optimistically takes effort. To change our thoughts, feelings, beliefs and stories of getting older is not an easy task because we are surrounded by anti-aging messaging (and I’m not just talking about wrinkle creams). The effort needed to shift our thinking around aging is well worth it because we all deserve to bring more vibrancy, boldness and optimism into our life, no matter what age we are. And, look, I get it. Aging isn’t all wine and roses. It definitely has its “ups and downs”. I’m hoping that we can shift our mindset enough so that we have way more “ups” and way less “downs’. 

What shifts are you willing to make to allow your aging to be more acceptable?

What thoughts are you willing to challenge when it comes to growing older?

How can we be more welcoming to our unique aging process?

What new feelings have you discovered to make aging a more pleasure-based experience?

Aging is 20% Lifestyle AND 80% Mindset.

What’s an AGEIST? You may be asking yourself. There are varied definitions, but the one I subscribe to most is this: Have you been judging yourself or others based upon your age? Do you tell yourself things like:

The best is behind me.
I’m all washed up. 
I’m too old.
I wish I was younger.
The good old days.
I’m not too bad for my age.
She looks good for her age.
Is that age-appropriate?

I hear these phrases a lot from women. And it breaks my heart. It reveals deep wounding. It reveals a deep  need for healing to overcome the conditioning that women, but especially women of a certain age, have been taught to embrace. To feel shame, loathing and/or disappointment as we get old is what society expects from us, anything else is considered unacceptable. The messaging is typically more covert, but there is plenty of  “in- your-face” messaging that we receive every day.

What if we welcomed in our Wise Woman, our Crone, our Sensual SAGE, as I like to call her?

To embrace yourself as a SAGE, means to embrace that you are
Sophisticated
Audacious
Genius &
Epic

Do you believe that? Do you feel it in the depths of your soul? It’s true… but is it YOUR TRUTH? I would love to invite you to peel away the layers, to dig deeply into your truth, your beliefs around aging. You may be somewhat shocked when you discover that you are being ageist towards yourself or others. How can we dismantle this type of thinking?

Start with small steps: notice your thoughts, ask where did the thought come from, is it yours or did you learn it from someone? Do you want to keep thinking that way? If not, what better thought can replace it? Becoming aware of our ageist thoughts is the first step to embracing aging and to stop resisting it. The only way to stop aging is to die. The only true anti-aging is death. Instead of wanting to stop our aging, let’s learn how to support it in the best possible way through lifestyle, through mindset, and through acceptance.

Here I am. 
More road behind than ahead. 
Lessons, experiences, discoveries, 
keep me on my toes. 
The small things remain small. 
The big things become small.
Some big things stay big. 
Nevertheless: 
The taste of tea,
the smell of lavender, 
the wet grass. 
Azure sky, bees, fish, birds warbling.
Show me… 
People come and go. 
People stay and stay.
Attachment breeds disappointment.
Rigidity begets pain.
I remain open hearted,
open minded 
with open senses. 
I bend without breaking. 
I stand without stooping. 
I kneel without falling. 
No age, no fear, no illness 
is the sum total of me.
I rejoice… 
And here I am.

KaZ

Warmly,
Meri
The Pro-Age Woman